To Live or Lose It All
by TheUnlovedOutcast
Summary: This is about a girl who's family is kidnapped by a demon. She gets to the makai, but will she find help? Finally some lime-ness! XD
1. Prelude: Kidnapped Families

Hello all you losers who have the time to actually read this ^_^. I was so bored I decided to write this story. In the first chapters, it's about the main character, Kellie. I probably will change the point of view often.  
  
"WRITING"= spoken stuff 'WRITING'= thoughts If anybody wants a disclaimer, go buy one from Al's Disclaimer Hut! _______________________________________________________________________  
  
"I'll never look at fish the same way again," I told Edie, explaining the shark we had to dissect in science class. Edie just kind of ignored me, like usual. I waited there for a minute.  
"Did you say something Kellie?" she asked.  
  
"Just smile and nod," I told her while rolling my eyes.  
  
Edie and I stared at each other for a moment and then burst out in giggles. I leaned so far back in my chair while giggling, I fell backwards. With my arms flailing, I let out a loud shriek and landed on the floor. Mr. Sierevelde, my language arts teacher, and all of my 7th period class turned and stared at me.  
  
"Well," I began, "I guess I can't fly!"  
  
I stood up and flashed a huge toothy smile and picked up my chair. Sitting down, I looked up at Mr. S, who had continued to read Tuck everlasting aloud to the class.  
  
'7th period and I'm still a klutzy blonde,' I thought. I retrieved a piece of paper and pencil from my book bag and started to doodle. My mind wandered off. After having Mr. S yell at me for not paying attention, I looked at my doodle. I quickly covered my paper with my hands and blushed a bit.  
  
"Sorry Mr. Sierevelde," I apologized.  
  
My drawing had been a picture of Kurama and me. I admit I did have a little crush on him. I gathered up my stuff and headed to my small locker.  
  
"What's with you and zoning out these days?" Edie asked.  
  
Opening my locker, I shoved in my books and stared at the pictures inside my locker. They were all YuYu Hakusho pictures I had downloaded from the internet. Most of them featured my favorite character.  
  
(A/N: If you don't already know my favorite character you've got to be blonde, stupid, or both. For those of you who are, my favorite is Kurama! ^_^).  
  
Edie started knocking on my head, "Anyone home?" she asked.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. Staying up for Inuyasha can do that to a person," I responded.  
  
"Staying up till one A.M. on school nights isn't the best idea you ever had. Just like that time you choked Chase on the bus until he couldn't breathe," she told me.  
  
Slamming my locker shut I rolled my book bag back to my desk. I sat on the stupid desk and asked Edie what the Social Studies homework was.  
  
Her response, like usual, was, "It's vacuous to ask vacuous people."  
  
I shook my head. It was another inside joke, just like the topical islands. Then I tilted my head back, getting ready to sneeze.  
  
"The wind-up and..." Hafeez yelled across the room, "Here's the pitch!"  
  
"AAHH-AHH-AHHHHHHCHOOOOOOOO!" I sneezed, falling off the desk.  
  
Hafeez started giggling with Aunan. Of course, I got pissed off. Taking off my high-top sandals, I ran after both of them.  
  
"I'm gonna hit you so hard, you'll wake up a week later in the hospital!" I yelled after them. "Eat rubber you jerk!" I shrieked while throwing my shoe at Hafeez.  
  
Hafeez fell flat on his face, a huge shoe print on the back of his head. Aunan rounded the corner and was tripped by my good friend, Audrey. Audrey, like me, was someone you didn't want to piss off.  
  
"Thanks....Audrey...." I panted, resting my hands on my knees.  
  
"No problem.......fluffy," she said smirking.  
  
"What the HELL did you just call me!?" I asked, half screaming.  
  
"Nothing, nothing," she said somewhat nervously.  
  
I smacked her on the head and heard the bell ring for bus call.  
  
"...19, 8, 32, 13, 14, 6, 22..." the annoyed voice droned over the loud speaker.  
  
As soon as I heard my bus was called I dashed out the door, down to the bus lane. I walked along side the buses, searching for #14. Finally spotting it, I got on and went to my seat near the middle of the bus.  
  
"Hey Angela!" I greeted the Chinese 6th grader that sat in the seat in front of mine.  
"Hey! Did you bring #7?" she asked with a thick Chinese accent.  
  
"Which series?" I inquired, "Inuyasha? Rayearth? X/1999?"  
  
"Ummm.....Inuyasha," she said happily. I dug through my book bag for the Inuyasha mangas.  
  
"Here we go," I said while handing her the Inuyasha #7. She immediately started reading. Sighing, I took out the fan fiction I had printed out during first period. Mrs. Hearne, my Social Studies teacher, hadn't found out. That was an absolute miracle.  
  
(A/N: The "e"s on the end of all my last names are silent)  
  
Angela opened her window, which sent my hair flying. Taking out a scrunchie, I pulled my shoulder-length blonde/brunette hair into a tight semi-bun. I continued reading my fan fiction, but after ten minutes I fell asleep on my book bag.  
  
"Kellie!"  
  
"Huh? What?" I asked the voice sleepily.  
  
"Took you long enough slut," Grant scorned.  
  
"Shut up whore!" I spat back at him. Grant was an old friend of mine that lived a few houses up the street.  
  
(A/N: yes these are nicknames that my guy friend and I gave each other. We just love teasing each other, well, I love teasing him ^_~)  
  
I yawned and the bus lurched to a stop. The door opened and Grant got his stuff together.  
  
He was almost off the bus when I called out, "Goodbye, Bob!"  
  
He turned around and stared at me. I flashed a huge toothy grin at him and he just shook his head. Grant jumped off the bus and headed up his driveway, toward his house. The bus drove down the road and stopped once again in front of my house.  
  
"Later, Ms. Sheila," I called to the middle-aged bus driver.  
  
"Goodbye Kellie," the overweight woman said and drove down the road.  
  
I rolled my book bag down the driveway, stopping only to get the mail. I noticed the garage was open, which was really strange. It was Friday, it was only Tuesdays and Sundays that the garage was ever left open.  
  
"Corie? Gib?" I questioned, wondering if I should scold them. "Corie? Gib? Anyone home?" I yelled. I left my book bag in the kitchen. I searched for a note of some sort, hoping they had gone next door.  
  
(A/N: Our neighbors, who are hardly ever home, have a trampoline and the others have horses. For those of you that are stupid, blonde, or both, Kellie is my character.)  
  
There was an envelope with my name on it and nothing else. Taking out a small knife, I opened the envelope.  
  
Miss Kellie Terwilligere,  
Your family is safe, for the time being. If you do not come to the following location, all of your insignificant family will die. Come to 3983 Lavista road. Come alone or you will never see them again.  
Signed,  
Anonymous  
  
My hand shot to my mouth and I dropped the vile letter. I backed away from it like it was diseased.  
  
"No, no. It has to be a joke," I said going into denial.  
  
I dialed my mom's cell phone, hoping she would answer. Nothing. "Calm down now," I commanded myself. Then a thought struck me like a ton of bricks. "Hunter! Kikyo!" I shrieked. I whistled to them, seeing if it would work. It didn't. "Ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-kikyo!" I tried once more, using my puppy's favorite call. I knew there was one person, err...spirit I could count on.  
  
'Do I dare call upon her?' I wondered. "Yes," I ordered myself. Taking out five unscented candles, I placed them at the five points of a star. After lighting them I did what I had to do. I had to sing a couple of verses from the Yu Yu Hakusho opening theme song, Smile Bomb.  
  
"I don't know where to go when I feel like crying, oh my!  
It's time to open my self to something new,  
I want to stop and grow up like you"  
  
I sang the verses almost identical to the original song. Suddenly, the candles flickered and the room grew cold, despite the flaming candles. The spirit of me dearly departed dog rose from the flames of my candles.  
  
Yawning, the spirit said, "Well I'm up. What's the big deal?"  
  
"Somebody kidnapped my family, even Kikyo and Hunter," I managed to say, still surprised it actually worked.  
  
"No wonder it's so quiet around here!" she said jokingly. I just gave her a death glare. She may have been dead, but that didn't make it any better or worse to joke about kidnappings. "Can you bring me the note?" she asked seriously.  
  
"Hold on," I whispered loudly. I ran down my stairs, into the kitchen. Picking up the note carefully, I jogged back to the bathroom. "Here, oh umm, I guess you can't hold it," I said, remembering that she was a flaming dog spirit. "I'll just read it to you," I mumbled. While reading the letter aloud, her expression showed she was deep in thought.  
  
"Hmmmm," she muttered. Then she sneezed. "Did you put pepper in the candles or something?" she asked while pointing to the candles with her right paw.  
  
"DON'T CHANGE THE DAMN SUBJECT SASSY!" I yelled at my dog.  
  
"Ok, ok. Don't have a heart attack," she told me calmly. "I just got a great idea!" she said happily.  
  
"Wow! It's a first," I said with sarcasm dripping from my every word. Sassy just gave me an annoyed look and continued.  
  
"What you need to do is get me a locket and I'll transfer into it. Then I can come with you to meet the person!" she said excitedly.  
  
"How do we even know it's a person?" I asked the flaming spirit.  
  
"You know, you watch way too much Yu Yu Hakusho," she retorted.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. Tell me something I don't know," I told her. She just rolled her deep dark auburn eyes. I strolled into Corie's room to get a locket, since I didn't have one of my own. Her lockets were always located in the miniature jewelry chest my dad had given Corie on her seventh birthday.  
  
"Do you need a specific one?" I asked/yelled to Sassy.  
  
"No, but do you think you could hurry your little search up? Fire isn't exactly comfortable, you know!" my dead dog yelled back. Picking a random locket, I ran back to her.  
  
"Ok, I got the locket. Now what the hell do I do?" I asked.  
  
"Now open the locket and put a tiny drop of water in it," she commanded. I looked at the locket I had selected. It was the gold plated one my brother had given Corie on her eighth birthday.  
  
~~(Flashback)~~  
  
All of my family, including the dogs, were sitting around the large dinning room table. Hunter and Sassy (we didn't get Kikyo until after Sassy died) begged for attention and food. Corie and Gib sat next to my mom and I sat next to my dad and Gib. We were all eating white chocolate cream cake. My mom and dad brought out the brightly colored gifts. Corie squealed excitedly and clapped her hands.  
  
"This one is from Gib," my mom announced. Corie snatched the small box out of Gib's hand and opened it quickly. She unlocked the little container and saw the cutest gold plated locket.  
  
"Thanks Gib!" she responded after gaping at the beautiful necklace. Pulling out a small piece of paper, she stuck in a small computer printed picture.  
  
~~(End Flashback)~~  
  
(A/N: She did get many more presents than that, I'm just too lazy to include it in the flashback =^-^=)  
  
When I unlatched the medium sized accessory, I saw the picture she had put in. It was one of her favorite character, Kuwabara. I never understood why she liked him the best. After slipping out the picture, I dropped in a little dribble of water and sat it next to the candle Sassy was hovering out of.  
  
"See you later," she said as she flew into the drop of water. I shut the locket and blew out the candles before I put on the necklace. I slipped the small chain over my head. The locket was warm and had a slight pulse to it. Clasping my hand over the accessory, I smiled.  
  
"Now how do I get to 3983 Lavista Road?" I asked myself, "Should I take a cab?"  
  
After this, the locket began to vibrate.  
  
"No, you should just walk there," Sassy called out sarcastically.  
  
"You know that it's just as easy to wear this as it is to flush it down the toilet!"  
  
I threatened her. The locket stopped shaking and returned to giving off a slight pulse. Yawning, I headed towards my room. Getting out a small book bag, I packed:  
  
Forty dollars A change of clothes Pepper spray A diamond ring A video recording of all the 54 English Yu Yu Hakusho shows A hairbrush And a Tupperware full of left over Sweet n' Sour Chicken  
  
(A/N: My favorite food just happens to be Sweet n' Sour Chicken ^_^)  
  
I didn't know why I packed what I did, but I figured most of it would come in handy. Yawning once again, I looked at my watch.  
  
"It's only 8:34 P.M.? Naptime, I guess," I told myself. Once my head touched my bed's pillow, I was dead to the world.  
  
************************************************************  
  
My eyes fluttered open as I stretched.  
  
"It's only one in the morning?"  
  
I asked after checking my watch. I sat up and swung my legs over the edge of the bed. Gathering up my stuff, I headed to the garage. I pulled out my dad's Harley Davidson motorcycle and strapped on the helmet. People often mistook me for 16, even though I was only 13. I ran back into the house and got the keys.  
  
"Thank God daddy taught me how to drive this contraption," I said to no one.  
  
________________________________________________________________________Did you peoples love my chapter? Flame me for all I care (I need to cook hotdogs anyway). Blade of Fire: You better review my damned story!!!!! Or I will hunt you down and kill you (j/k!)!  
  
Yusuke: Are we done here yet? Kuwabara: Yeah no one wants to hear your stupid story! They want to hear about me and Yukina! Hiei: Hn *tries to kill Kuwabara* Kurama: *sweat drops and holds back Hiei* Shut up Kuwabara TUO (TheUnlovedOutcast): KURAMA!!! *clings to Kurama while he tries to hold back Hiei* Chibi Chibi (TUO's muse): We'll see you in the next chapter! *Threatens to burn all of TUO's pictures if she doesn't let go of Kurama* TUO: *lets go quickly* =^_^= 


	2. Stupid Cops and Demons Galore!

I finally got time to post my next chapter. ^_^ Thanks to all of those who did review!!! This chapter is more about Kellie but I finally put the YYH gang in =^-^=. "WRITING"= spoken stuff 'WRITING'= thoughts ~WRITING~= words on shirts Disclaimer: If I owned Yu Yu Hakusho, the world wouldn't be safe. _______________________________________________________________________  
  
I secured my bag and swung my leg over the midnight black motorcycle. I put the keys in the ignition and started it up. The loud roar of the engine cut through the silence of early morning. I got positioned and drove onto the road. I kept speeding down the roads until I reached the highway. I had finally found Lavista road, after an hour of searching, when a cop pulled me over.  
  
"Do you know how fast you were going?" he asked trying to sound superior to me.  
  
"Uhhhhhh," I began to say.  
  
"65 in a 40 mile per hour speed zone," he interrupted. "License and registration please."  
  
I froze. I remembered that I didn't have a driver's license. 'Now is when a witty idea needs to hit me!' I yelled in my head. Suddenly I did get a good idea and smacked my forehead with the palm of my hand.  
  
"Sir," I began nervously, "I don't carry important documentation like that with me. If I could just drive home and get it...."  
  
"I'm not that stupid. I'll drive to your house and get it. Now, what's your address?" he demanded.  
  
'Thank You Kami-sama!!!' I mentally thanked God. "1414 Cinco drive," I answered calmly, knowing that wasn't my address.  
  
"I'll be right back," he informed me quickly, then drove off.  
  
I waited until he turned the corner to start up my Harley. Turning down Lavista, I looked for the address.  
  
"3973, 3975, 3977, 3979, 3981," I mumbled to myself. "Yes! I found it! 3983."  
  
I pulled into the little flower shop's parking lot and turned off the motorcycle. "Hello? Hello?!" I called out, wondering if anyone would answer.  
  
"Hello," a deep masculine voice whispered while placing a large hand on my shoulder.  
  
I screamed like any normal 13-year old girl would do. Once I got over that, I spun around to see who it was. An 8-foot tall masculine outline was visible in the intense darkness. A small horn-like thing stuck out of his head and black wavy hair spilled from his head to his mid-back. White eyes flashed at me as I surveyed him.  
  
Wh-who are you?" I stammered. Fear claimed my every thought as it stepped forward into the moonlight.  
  
(A/N: Yes this thing is a demon. And for you who are blonde, stupid, or both; I will tell you one thing: get a DAMNED brain ^-^)  
  
"I am Ojuka the great," the demon answered proudly.  
  
"Ojuka, Ojuka, where have I heard that name before?" I asked myself while tapping my fingers on my head. I looked closer at him and spied something peeling off his neck. It hit me like a ton of bricks.  
  
"Why are you wearing a mask?" I asked this stupid demon.  
  
"What do you mean?" Ojuka asked, trying to cover his nervousness.  
  
"I mean you're wearing a damn mask. Do you take me for some kind of baka ningen?" I demanded.  
  
"Well...ummm...uhhhhhh," he tried to answer. He gave a defeated sigh and jerked off the fake skin. The face beneath resembled Suzuka's greatly.  
  
"Suzuka? Suzuka!" I grinned madly at the demon who was glaring daggers at me.  
  
"Too bad the rest of the gang isn't here," he muttered sarcastically.  
  
He took off the rest of his disguise. He was wearing loose blue jeans and a forest green shirt that said ~Go Away~. His hair was short, like it was when he gave the items to Kuwabara and Kurama. Suzuka grabbed my wrist and started to walk. I yanked it back.  
  
"Let's go!" he yelled at me.  
  
"Where are we going? I like to know where people attempt to drag me!" I yelled back while following him into the flower shop.  
  
"You'll see," he called back excitedly.  
  
"Why..." I began. Looking around, I saw Suzuka jump into a roomy row boat. "What the hell?" I asked.  
  
He grabbed my wrist again and tried to pull me in. I yanked my hand back once again. I lost my balance and fell in anyway. The flower shop disappeared around us. A vast ocean lay all around the spacious row boat. Its gentle rocking soon made Suzuka sea-sick.  
  
Handing me two oars he said, "Row us to shore."  
  
I got annoyed and smacked him in the back of the head with one of the oars. Suzuka turned around and glared at me while I giggled. I noticed him scowling and began to row. It took me a good two hours to row to shore and my arms ached. The boat was beached on a sandy coast of a weird looking little island.  
  
I sat in the boat and stared at him while he got out. He gave me a puzzled look and helped me out. I stumbled onto the wet sand and my foot sunk. The sand was up to my ankle. After a couple of unsuccessful tries, I managed to get my foot out.  
  
I held my sister's locket up near my face and whispered, "Sassy! I have no idea where I am. Can I get a little help!?"  
  
No answer. I tapped on the locket until she did answer.  
  
"Let me out of here!" she yelled.  
  
Opening the locket was quite difficult, but when it opened it wasn't a dog spirit that stepped out. A tall woman with long dark hair came out. Her nose was kind of pointy and she was quite thin. She also had a small bump on her head and black pointed dog ears. This woman wore red boot-cut pants and a long, loose black shirt with blue flames at the bottom.  
  
"Who the hell are you?" I blurted out, quickly covering my mouth with my hands like a small school girl.  
  
"Shit. How do I put this?" she muttered to herself. "Well, you knew me as an Akita named Sassy, but I'm actually a wolf demon named Salumi," she said calmly.  
  
(A/N: Does anyone else feel hungry after hearing her name? Salami? Salumi? I just thought you might be.)  
  
To say I felt stupid was the understatement of the year.  
  
"Why am I here?" I whispered to her.  
  
"How the hell should I know?" she asked back.  
  
~~~~******Suzuka's Point Of View******~~~~  
  
I stood there watching Salumi whisper to the human she was fond of. Let me say one thing: waiting is boring. I finally got fed up.  
  
"I'll be right back Salumi" I told my old friend.  
  
She and the human looked startled when I said this. Listening to them was about as interesting as talking to a wall.  
  
~~~~******Kellie's Point Of View******~~~~  
  
True, I was startled. But what really startled me came next.  
  
"How do you know Suzuka?" Salumi asked me.  
  
"I don't. I followed that damned letter's instructions and he was there," I told her, she seemed confused. "How do you know him?"  
  
"He's an old friend of mine. He helped me get the dog form," Salumi informed me.  
  
I just stared at her. She knew Suzuka and never told me? Now my head hurt with confusion. I sat down on the beach, looking out over the ocean. Salumi sighed and sat next to me. I put my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands. Yawning, I drifted off to sleep.  
  
~~(Dream)~~  
  
I clutched my head because it felt like it was spinning. I sat up and noticed I was in a field of flowers. The roses, daisies, and tulips smelled beautiful. Groaning, I stood up and looked all around me. The field was endless.  
  
"It's so beautiful," I whispered.  
  
Suddenly a large swarm of bees rose from inside the flowers. The insects began to fly towards me. The strange thing was, the all died before they got within a foot of me. Then everything began to disappear.  
  
~~(End Dream)~~  
  
I woke up later. Salumi had left while I was sleeping. Shivering, I noticed that it was raining slightly. I stood up and stretched, while looking for a sign that I wasn't deserted here. Two figures were walking about twenty feet away.  
  
"Hello!" I called to them.  
  
One of the figures turned and talked to the other. They walked over and I looked at them in shock. The first was a tall blue demon with long fangs and nails. He wore a pair of loose brown pants. The other was a short apparition dressed in green. It had a kawaii little hat on its head that covered its long charcoal/azure hair.  
  
"Holy shit Konoyama! It's a human!" the blue demon yelled.  
  
"No, really?" Konoyama replied sarcastically.  
  
"Shut up stupid," the blue demon yelled at Konoyama.  
  
"Why don't you Washitare?" Konoyama yelled back.  
  
I stood there, listening to them argue. They continued to fight about meaningless things.  
  
"I don't mean to be rude, but would you please stop your dispute long enough for me to ask something?" I asked in a meek voice.  
  
They stared at me in amazement. I cleared my throat and managed to get up enough courage to ask them what needed to be asked.  
  
"Where am I?" I finally demanded.  
  
"You're on an island in the middle of the ocean," Washitare answered mordantly.  
  
"Will you shut up Washitare? You're on a little island inhabited by ruthless demon thieves," she told me proudly.  
  
A cerulean Cyclops walked by, a weird look on his face. He jogged over to Konoyama and asked her something. Konoyama whispered something in his ear and he began to look quite smug. He drew a little katana and waved it in my face.  
  
"Damned humans aren't allowed here. You should leave before you get hurt," he said while waving the katana closer to my face.  
  
"I'll go just as soon as I want to!" I shouted at him and grabbed his arm.  
  
"You little bitch!" he spat while yanking his arm back and stabbed me in the arm.  
  
I yelped in pain and jumped back. I could feel the warm sticky blood dripping down my arm. Covering my wound with my hand was the best thing I could think of.  
  
"Toi fils de un chienne!" I yelled this French insult at him.  
  
(A/N: If you want the translation, just ask)  
  
Something hit me in the back of the head and I passed out.  
  
~~~~******Normal Point Of View******~~~~  
  
Washitare stood behind Kellie as she fell to the ground.  
  
"She was starting to get on my nerves," he said to the others.  
  
The cerulean demon gave Washitare a high five and Konoyama glared at them. All their ears perked up when they heard rustling in the brush behind them. They ran off in the opposite direction.  
  
"Koenma just had to ruin my spring break by sending us on this damn mission," a tall ebony haired boy grumbled. He wore a blue jean jacket, a red shirt, and blue jeans.  
  
"Shut up Urameshi!" a taller red head yelled. He wore almost all blue except for a white shirt.  
  
"So the baka can talk," said a short demon. He wore mostly black with a white bandana around his forehead.  
  
"Be quiet Hiei," scolded a second red head. He wore loose blue jeans and a black shirt.  
  
"Hn," Hiei answered.  
  
Yusuke and the gang walked through the thick brush for quite a while. Koenma had given them a mission to find an elusive demon. Her name was Salumi and that's all the information they got. They continued walking, grumbling, and arguing. Some time later, Kurama sniffed the air, curious as to what he smelled.  
  
"Well, that's strange," he said to no one in particular.  
  
"What?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
"Yeah, what's up Kurama?" Yusuke also asked.  
  
"I smell human blood, but only demons know how to get here," he told them.  
  
Hiei rolled his eyes and ran off to see where the smell was coming from. Kurama, Yusuke, Kuwabara ran after him, eager to see who's blood it was. Hiei stopped at the edge of the beach where he saw a human girl laying in the sand. The rest of the group finally got there and saw this human girl.  
  
Her arm was bleeding profusely and the blood was pooling around her. Yusuke rolled her over and saw that she was unconscious. Kuwabara came over and took of the locket that hung loosely around her neck. He handed it to Kurama for him to examine it.  
  
"This locket held a spirit, but it's been empty for a while now," he told them.  
  
Everybody who liked my chapter should review. Some people were a little bit OOC, I do admit that. Guess what? I cloned my muse!!! If you want to know what Chibi Chibi and Chibi Mini look like, just ask.  
  
TUO: *sits at her computer* I'm so bored. Chibi Chibi: *dances around with his clone, Chibi Mini* Yusuke: Ok. Now I'm bored. Kuwabara: Stupid authoress took me away from Yukina Hiei: Hn Kurama: *sleeping in the corner* TUO: *gets an idea* CORIE!!!! Corie (TUO's little sis): *runs out* What do you want? TUO: to show you that one of your favorite characters is here. Corie: *looks around* Where's Puu? TUO: *sweat drops* not Puu, Kuwabara. Corie: KUWABARA!!!! *latches onto Kuwabara's arm* Kuwabara: AAAHHHHHHH! GET OFF! *tries to shake off Corie* TUO: *giggles* 


	3. Emotions Run Wild

I finally got time to update!!! There's more emotional crap in this chappie, so......REVIEW GOD DAMNIT!!! I need ideas for pairings gimme some ideas!!!  
  
"WRITING" = spoken 'WRITING' = thoughts ~~ = telepathic conversation /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\  
  
Kurama slipped the small locket into his right pocket. Yusuke ripped a piece of his shirt and bandaged Kellie's arm. She groaned when the bandage was being put on. Kuwabara just kind of got bored, until....  
  
"Hey look! She has a back pack! Can I go through it?" Kuwabara asked excitedly.  
  
Everyone else face faulted and sweat dropped. Kuwabara just stared at them.  
  
"Well? Can I?" he persisted.  
  
"Of course not, baka. Those are her personal belongings," Kurama answered.  
  
Meanwhile, Kuwabara was trying to take the book bag off her back. She groaned and he jumped back. After a minute he yanked the book bag off.  
  
"OWWWWW! Damnit Corie, get this little shit out of my room," Kellie mumbled.  
  
(A/N: Ok, for those of you who are wondering: little shit=Kikyo, the puppy)  
  
"AAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!! SHE'S POSSESSED!!!!" Kuwabara yelled at the top of his lungs.  
  
Yusuke slapped him upside the head while Hiei just kind of gave him a weird look. Kurama chuckled to himself. Kellie stirred and held her head. She grunted and sat up.  
  
"Hn," was all Hiei said, like usual.  
  
"Hey she's waking up," Kuwabara said, stating the obvious.  
  
"You think?" Yusuke asked sarcastically.  
  
The group watched as Kellie stretched and opened her eyes.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" she screamed loud enough to inform the whole damned island.  
  
Hiei gave her a death glare to end humanity as we know it.  
  
"OMG! It's HIE-KURAMA!!!!!" she yelled as she spotted Kurama slowly inching away.  
  
Kellie got up and clutched her head. After a moment she started running and tackled Kurama. She clung to him like a monkey. Hiei looked bemused while Yusuke and Kuwabara doubled over laughing. Kurama glared at them while trying to pry the girl from his arm.  
  
"Pinch me, I must be dreaming," she said.  
  
Well, Kuwabara did.  
  
"OOOOOOUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!" Kellie shrieked at the top of her lungs.  
  
She automatically let go of Kurama and walked over to Kuwabara. She picked up a stick and started beating Kuwabara endlessly. Hiei, who was amused by this, chuckled slightly in spite of himself. Kellie stopped beating the oaf and stared blankly at Hiei.  
  
"IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!" Kellie yelled while running around.  
  
"I guess we should set up camp here, unless someone has an idea to get rid of that psycho," Yusuke suggested.  
  
Kellie stopped mid-step and mid-yell. They stared as she stormed up to Yusuke.  
  
"What did you just call me?" she said while balling her fist.  
  
"Ummm, psycho?" Yusuke stated bluntly.  
  
Kellie, obviously pissed, slapped him. Yusuke had a red handprint on his face that could make Rudolf's nose look dim. Kellie walk away, somewhat satisfied. Yusuke, well Yusuke had big swirly eyes.  
  
"Where in all the three worlds am I?" Kellie asked the two demons.  
  
"You're on an island, baka," Hiei informed her.  
  
"Well, DUH! But where exactly?" she asked.  
  
"In the middle of the Pacific Ocean" Kurama told Kellie.  
  
"I knew I shouldn't have trusted that damn demon," she muttered under her breath.  
  
"Which demon?" inquired Kurama. 'Maybe it was Salumi,' he thought.  
  
"Suzuka. He even knew Salumi, hell, I didn't even know who she was!" she told him.  
  
"Suzu-" Yusuke tried to ask.  
  
"How do you know Salumi?" Hiei demanded.  
  
"Well, you see, it goes like this. I had a dog named Sassy, until she got run over. Months later, my family was kidnapped so I asked her spirit to help me. She went into my locket and we came here. Where is my locket?" I said, interrupting my story.  
  
"Here," Kurama said as he fished the locket out of his pocket.  
  
"Ok. There was a blonde, a brunette, and a red head running from the cops. They all hid in potato bags. The cops came over to the red heads bag and-" Kellie tried to tell them.  
  
"Get back to the story!" Yusuke yelled  
  
"I opened up my locket and out comes Salumi. Then I got attacked by demons after Salumi left. Then I passed out and you found me, now I'm telling a weird story to my favorite TV show's characters," she finished.  
  
"Wait a minute. We're a TV show?" Yusuke asked.  
  
"Yup, it's called Yu Yu Hakusho!" she added. "Where's my back pack?" she asked.  
  
"Ummm, here," Kuwabara said while throwing the back pack to her.  
  
She tried to catch it but ended up yelling out another "OUCH" when she caught it with the wrong arm. Afterwards, she took out all her Yu Yu Hakusho tapes. She let everyone see them and then snatched them back.  
  
Then, she fell asleep. The others, who had resolved they had nothing better to do, decided to go to sleep. Salumi watched from the bushes.  
  
"Good," was all she said.  
  
She darted off to find another meal. She killed and ate a rabbit. Salumi sat down and waited for Suzuka to return.  
  
"Took you long enough," Salumi scolded.  
  
"Well, you try finding this," he said while holding up a large blue jewel with swirls of red in the center, the Enitanopeli Crystal.  
  
"Wow! Where did you find that?" she asked slightly amazed.  
  
"Washitare and Konoyama had it. They took it from a human," he smirked.  
  
Salumi snatched the crystal from his hand. He stared at how fast she was. She sniffed the jewel and smelled the faintest scent of human.  
  
(A/N: Hmmmm, I wonder which human it is. There's only one on this stupid island!)  
  
"So, what the hell does this do?" The wolf demon asked.  
  
"Well, according to legend, it's supposed to take a person's greatest desire and make it a reality in the midst of tragedy. I believe they human they got it from was obsessed with some TV show so, we ended up meeting her," Suzuka explained.  
  
Salumi nodded and wondered if her greatest desire would be granted. Whenever she thought about it, a slight blush would tint her cheeks.  
  
"I think I'll hold onto the Enitanopeli Crystal for now," Salumi whispered and slid the little jewel into her pocket.  
  
"I'll be back. I need to go do something," she said quickly.  
  
Salumi disappeared in the slowly growing shadows that enveloped most of the isle. Her fading form walked north, towards the center of the island.  
  
"Salumi," Suzuka whispered, "you could have just told me you wanted to see your human."  
  
Yusuke and Kuwabara fell asleep earlier than they expected. Kurama and Hiei were the only ones up. Hiei sat in a tall tree, on a thick branch. They were talking about Kellie and whether they should trust her or not.  
  
"Hiei, she's a harmless human. What could she possibly have to hide?"  
  
"Hn. How should I know?"  
  
"So, why can't you trust her?"  
  
"It's intuition, baka no kitsune."  
  
Salumi listened intently to their conversation. 'Oh my god! She's sleeping in the spirit detectives' camp?! Shit shit shit!!' Salumi mentally cursed. Kellie slept fitfully, always tossing and turning. She would mumble something occasionally and then grimace.  
  
~~~~******Kurama's Point Of View******~~~~  
  
~Hiei? Hiei! ~ I telepathically talked to Hiei  
  
~Hn~ was all Hiei replied  
  
~Something is out there. ~ I told him.  
  
~So you sensed it too? ~ He inquired.  
  
~Yes. It's ki very low, but not naturally. A demon is trying to spy. ~ I told him.  
  
~Hn~ he replied again.  
  
~~~~******Normal Point Of View******~~~~  
  
Kurama looked over at Hiei and nodded. The small fire demon "faded" and appeared behind the wolf demon. Kurama got up and walked over. Salumi tried to run, but she was caught by the short demon.  
  
He twisted her arm behind her back and she winced. Salumi let her ki flare, which was so high it woke Kellie. She yawned and stretched, looking around for Kurama and Hiei. Kellie saw the fox youkai walked over to the ebony haired wolf demon and Hiei.  
  
"Salumi?" Kellie whispered to the wolf youkai.  
  
"Kellie?!" Salumi called back quietly.  
  
"Salumi!" Kellie yelled back.  
  
The human girl ran over to Salumi and hugged her. Kellie clung to her for dear life. Little tears of happiness escaped from Kellie's eyes.  
  
"Baka ningen! Get away from this thief. She's dangerous," Hiei said.  
  
"So? You and Kurama were both thieves before Yusuke came along!" Kellie cried back, tears collecting in her eyes.  
  
"Kellie," Kurama said, placing his hand on her shoulder.  
  
"Shut up!" Kellie screamed, waking up the rest of the gang in the process.  
  
The girl shrugged off Kurama's hand. Salumi wrenched her arm free and hugged Kellie. A single tear slid down the wolf youkai's cheek. Yusuke walked over and saw what was happening. Kuwabara stood still, utterly confused. The girl sobbed and muttered something along the lines of: "you can't take her away. If you do, I'll hate you all forever".  
  
"Don't put her through any more pain, I beg of you," pleaded Salumi.  
  
"Alright, but only for a while," Yusuke said.  
  
Kellie fell to her knees, still crying but not as much. Salumi decided she needed to do something. The wolf youkai turned into her previous form, the Akita named Sassy. The dog nuzzled her face against Kellie's tear-soaked cheeks. The girl looked up and smiled.  
  
"Sassy," she whispered.  
  
She threw her arms around the dog's neck. Kellie buried her face into the soft fur that now covered Salumi from head to tail. The tears had stopped flowing and she sniffled. Kellie lay back down, her red and swollen eyes closing slowly.  
  
(A/N: As long as Salumi is in her previous form, I'm going to call her Sassy)  
  
Sassy curled up next to the sleeping figure, sighing happily. The poor girl had been through enough tonight. Hiei jumped back into his tree and Yusuke lay back down.  
  
"I'll be back in a bit, I need to clear my head," the kitsune told Hiei.  
  
"Hn," Hiei replied.  
  
The fox youkai wandered through the dense forest. He sensed many ki signatures, many of them he didn't know. He felt something approaching and didn't want to be recognized. He transformed into a snow-white fox. The kitsune hid in the brush as the figure passed.  
  
Strangely enough, Kurama knew this demon. Suzuka walked past him and he followed. The fox tailed him until they came to the edge of the forest. The sand sank under their and the ocean lapped against the shore.  
  
"I don't like to be followed. Show yourself," Suzuka demanded.  
  
The white kitsune once again became the red haired Kurama. He greeted Suzuka and asked him what he was doing.  
  
"I was looking for a dear friend of mine. She seems to have disappeared," he answered, distress dripping from his words.  
  
"What is her name?" Kurama asked, hoping to help.  
  
"Her name is Salumi and her ki signature departed a few minutes ago," he responded. /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ Hey peoples!  
  
Press the tiny purple button, you know you want to. Come on!!! Oh Well.  
  
Yusuke: Serves you right, making me look serious  
  
Kuwabara: She made me look like an idiot  
  
Hiei: You ARE an idiot  
  
Kuwabara: Shut up shortie!  
  
Hiei: Hn  
  
TUO: *huggles Kurama* I'm sorry  
  
Kurama: Ummmmmm...why?  
  
TUO: *smacks him* FOR BEING SO MEAN TO YOU! 


	4. Hello Insanity!

Hellos to all my lovely reviewers!  
And to those of you who didn't, shame on you!  
Y'all are the ones that make me sad. Thanks to TheRealKelly, Oni, yuki-san, heatherb, and fatlazikat (the only peoples who did review!!!)  
Warning: Random insanity, singing, angsty stuffs, and hints at shonen ai!  
  
Chibi Chibi: TheUnlovedOutcast does NOT own YYH, Evanescence, Anastacia, or Jin's quotes.  
  
(Makes ya wonder, huh?)  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~^_^  
  
"Her name is Salumi and her ki signature departed a few minutes ago," he responded.  
  
"I'm sorry that I can't help you," Kurama lied.  
  
Suzuka nodded and sauntered off. Kurama became a spirit fox once again and snuck back to camp. He saw Yusuke sleeping a few feet from Kuwabara while Kellie was curled up next to Sassy. Hiei was in his tree, just barely asleep. He absent mindedly walked past the sleeping figures and caught himself growling quietly as he passed Sassy.  
  
'What the hell?' he thought.  
  
Kurama thought nothing of it, and fell asleep under Hiei's tree.  
  
The next morning, when everyone was awake, they started talking about what they should do. They all sat around talking.  
  
"So you found me, now what?" Salumi asked.  
  
"Well we do have orders from Koenma to take you back to spirit world," Kurama replied.  
  
"Why?" Kellie asked.  
  
"Well....ummm......you see..." Kuwabara stuttered.  
  
"Translation please?" Kellie asked.  
  
"What that moron is trying to say is that Salumi is a criminal and Koenma ordered us to bring her back," Yusuke answered.  
  
"So, what did you do?" Kellie asked the wolf demon.  
  
"I stole this," she answered while taking out the Enitanopeli Crystal.  
  
"So that's where it went!" Kellie said.  
  
The guys gave her a quizzical look. She smiled and decided to explain.  
  
"Well, it was about 4 years ago when I found this. I was looking for a present to get my sister. I had gone to the mall, hoping to find something affordable. When I found the right gift, an old lady gave me the jewel. She told me to wish for something good and hold onto it. I thought nothing of it and put the crystal in my pocket. A couple days before Salumi's dog form died, it disappeared," she finished.  
  
Now everyone was looking towards Salumi for an explanation. She giggled nervously.  
  
"Did you take it before you died?" Kellie asked her.  
  
"Yes"  
  
"...WHY?!" Kellie asked again.  
  
"Well, I knew I had to leave and I didn't want you and your family getting hurt. So I took the crystal and swallowed it right before I was hit, so that I could hold onto after I was out of my canine form," she answered.  
  
(A/N: Sassy was hit by a car in front of the local high school, just in case you wanted to know. *sniffle, sniffle*)  
  
"Then why did I end up here if we weren't supposed to be hurt!?!" Kellie half yelled at her.  
  
"Because the crystal stayed on my canine form's collar."  
  
"Hey guys, what does the Enizanopili Crystal do?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
"Enitanopeli Crystal, moron," Yusuke and Kellie said in unison.  
  
"It's supposed to take a person's greatest desire and make it a reality in the midst of a tragedy," Salumi answered.  
  
"Wait a minute, how did the crystal get onto your collar?" Kellie asked.  
  
"When I was hit, the impact force out the contents of my stomach. The vets attached the crystal to my collar for some reason," Salumi explained.  
  
"Then how did you get it back?" Kurama asked.  
  
"I stole it," Salumi answered simply.  
  
Kellie rolled her eyes. It was bad enough that she couldn't find her family, but now her dog/wolf demon was going to have to be arrested?  
  
Hiei had zoned out and was staring straight at a tree. Kuwabara noticed this and waved his hand in front of the half fire demon's face.  
  
"Hey shorty! Shorty? Hello, anybody home?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
For some unknown reason, Hiei bit Kuwabara on the hand.  
  
"AAHHHHHH! HE BIT ME!!" Kuwabara screamed.  
  
Kellie and Salumi laughed with Yusuke as Kurama shook his head. Kurama started muttering something under his breath and, unfortunately, Hiei heard it. The smaller demon gave him an I-know-exactly-what-you-just-said smile. Kurama saw it and blushed lightly. Kellie saw this and winked at Salumi.  
  
"Somebody's got a crush," Kellie sang into Salumi's ear. They both collapsed in fits of laughter.  
  
Kuwabara and Yusuke stared at them in utter confusion. Kurama turned away, blushing more.  
  
"Hn." Hiei said.  
  
Salumi stopped laughing, while Kellie continued. She knew Kellie was treading on thin ice, so to speak.  
  
"Kellie! Shut the fuck up," Salumi hissed.  
  
Kellie just kept laughing. Salumi got irritated and smacked her with a stick.  
  
"Ouches! What was that for?!" Kellie asked. Anime tears spilling from her eyes.  
  
(A.N.: Remember the ones Uraurishima had when he went up against Youko in the dark tournament? These are the same ones.)  
  
"For being a moron," she spat.  
  
Kellie was going to pout and then she got an idea. The ningen headed straight for her pack and fished around for something. The girl took out a bottle of pepper spray. She sprayed Salumi in the face.  
  
"AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Salumi cried out.  
  
Kellie laughed evilly and went back to her book bag. She searched for something else now.  
  
"We need to get her food soon. She goes insane when she's hungry. We need to get her anything before she gets out......"Salumi tried to instruct.  
  
"MY HAIRBRUSH OF ULTIMATE DOOM!!!" Kellie interrupted.  
  
Kellie began to chase Yusuke with her hairbrush. She hit him right in the back of the head and he did a face plant into the dirt. Kellie laughed menacingly. She began to chase Kuwabara, but he was a little bit too slow. She hit him just like she did to Yusuke. Then she fished into her back pack again, but she checked the front pouch instead. She took out a CD player, a set of mini speakers, and the Anastacia CD.  
  
(A.N: Anastacia is SO cool. *squeals* Now how did I find that in there.....)  
  
Kellie put the CD in and turned to track 1. She now clutched her hairbrush like a microphone. Then, she began to sing "Freak of Nature".  
"I'm a freak! Excuse me, what you say to me?  
  
Oh no you said it.  
  
No, I'm not  
  
I'm sorry but, you know, I ain't that kind o' girl!"  
  
(A.N: This part is spoken, just in case you wanted to know)  
  
"Look at me and see a little girl inside my skin,  
  
it's so supernatural. Ow!  
  
So don't be try'n to push up on me, baby.  
  
My mamma told me better than that:  
  
The bigger you are, the harder you fall. I'm above the original, not typical,  
  
not ooh la la, baby.  
  
You can hold me responsible,  
  
it's chemical if you're bringing it out in me. aaaaaah ah aaaaaaaaaaah,  
  
I'm a freak of nature.  
  
You better beware o' danger.  
  
aaaaaah ah aaaaaaaaaaah,  
  
I'm your midnight angel.  
  
I'm a freak,  
  
come on yeah  
  
I'm a freak of nature. I'm a little material, got bling bling  
  
My glasses got a shade, yeah  
  
But there's a hippy chick in me that's barefoot  
  
Walking in the grass  
  
Just 'cause I like sipping on champagne  
  
Doesn't mean I'm not afraid of the rain. I'm a bomb in a physical  
  
Not practical, not plan-ahead baby  
  
If you open Pandora's box  
  
Prepare yourself, 'cause the world'll be changing aaaaaah ah aaaaaaaaaaah  
  
Freak of nature, yeah  
  
You better beware o'danger.  
  
aaaaaah ah aaaaaaaaaaah,  
  
I'm your midnight angel. (I'm a freak) ohhh yeah  
  
I'm a freak of nature Freaky, deaky, look completely sassafras,  
  
so honey drink me.  
  
fingerlickin', I been thinkin'  
  
I'm the bomb, your clock is tickin'. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah  
  
haha  
  
yeah boy f... yeah, heya oh I'm a bomb in a physical  
  
Not practical, not plan-ahead baby  
  
If you open Pandora's box  
  
Prepare yourself, 'cause the world'll be changing ooooooooooh Freak of nature  
  
You better beware o'danger.  
  
aaaaaah ah aaaaaaaaaaah  
  
come on  
  
I'm your midnight angel  
  
(I'm a freak)  
  
oh freak  
  
I'm a freak of nature (ahhhhhh)  
  
freak of nature  
  
you better beware o'danger (ahhh)  
  
I'm your midnight angel  
  
(I'm a freak) ooooh yeah  
  
I'm a freak of nature haha right, that's freaky enough for me"  
  
Kuwabara stood clutching his ears and Yusuke just kind of stood there. He was completely dazed. Hiei had run away after the spoken part while Kurama had gone off in search of food. Salumi had joined in right after the first "I'm a freak!"  
"I guess she must be hungry too," Yusuke mumbled, referring to Salumi. Salumi started growling when she heard him. Kellie just growled for no reason. She ended up giggling and danced with the match she found in her pocket. They all stared at her when she lit the match and burned herself.  
  
"OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!" she screamed and had the same anime tears as before.  
  
Hiei flitted around for no reason. He just liked to be fast. He stopped in a tree top suddenly when he saw Kurama. Why was it that Kurama always escaped the insanity that had consumed their camp? Why was HE always stuck babysitting?  
  
~°Stupid damn fox°~ Hiei pouted.  
  
~°Well hello to you too, Hiei°~ Kurama answered.  
  
That startled Hiei, a lot. He quickly closed the mind link before he said something stupid. Hiei masked his ki and snuck to a closer tree. Kurama was gathering food, and it looked like he had bananas. Wait...bananas?! He sweat dropped and continued to watch. Kurama sat down, waiting for another idea to hit him. He knew Hiei was in the tree. A demon came over to him and asked where he got the bananas. The apparition was short and wore all green. It had the cutest little hat that covered its two-toned hair.  
  
"The bananas are about a quarter of a mile to the east and ten steps to your right," he told her.  
  
"Thanks. My name's Konoyama, what's yours?"  
  
"I'm Kurama"  
  
"Nice to meet you. Later days!"  
  
Kurama got up and started to walk back to the make-shift camp. Hiei flitted away again to beat Kurama there.  
  
"Goodbye Hiei" Kurama whispered.  
  
In a few seconds, Hiei was back. What he saw was utter chaos. Yusuke was up in a tree, while Salumi's dog form was barking and growling at him. Kellie was acting like a dog and chasing Kuwabara. She would stop and giggle occasionally. Hiei walked over to Sassy and asked what was wrong. Meanwhile, Kellie had chased Kuwabara into a tree and started to do Jin impersonations. She put on a fake accent and danced around.  
  
"I thought I was crazy Urameshi! You take the prize! The heck with this! You don't make bombs go boom in your face!"  
  
Sassy bit Hiei and told him to butt out. Hiei and Salumi got into a huge fight and accidentally cut down the tree Yusuke was in.  
  
"I don't really give a damn. Let someone else go."  
  
Kurama came back to see Salumi and Hiei fighting, Kellie quoting Jin, Kuwabara in a tree, and Yusuke looking annoyed. He laughed a little and everybody turned to stare at him. Kellie saw that Kurama had bananas. So she ran over and tackled him. She took a banana, got up, and ate it. Then Kellie fell asleep.  
  
"Well that was close," Sassy told them.  
  
"Why?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
"If she had to wait any longer, I don't think Koenma would survive," Salumi informed them.  
  
(A.N: Whenever she transforms into her dog form and vice versa, I'll switch names.)  
  
"What does she have against Koenma?" Yusuke asked.  
  
"She thinks he's annoying and full of himself," Salumi told them.  
  
"Hn. I hate the little twerp, but you don't see me killing him," Hiei stated.  
  
"Yeah, but you aren't a psycho."  
  
"Too true," Kurama said.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~^_^  
  
I need to ask a favor from everyone who reads this chapter and has AIM!  
  
Saiyaka: What would that be?  
  
TUO: I need these peoples to IM Dezno 06 and call him a creepy stalker who loves Barney.  
  
Everyone except TUO: *falls over anime style*  
  
TUO: Thanks to those of you who do!  
  
Saiyaka: Please review; no one likes an angry sugar high authoress with matches. Baka Hikari  
  
TUO: I heard that! Stupid yami, can't do anything right.  
  
Saiyaka: -_-;;  
  
Chibi Chibi and Chibi Mini: *playing truth or dare with a match* 


	5. Dream Pummeling and Random Songs

GOMEN!!! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in soooooooooooooooooooooo long.  
  
I wanted to thank my lovely reviewers, but no one reviewed!!  
*sobs in the corner* Oh Well...on to the fic  
  
Kurama: TUO doesn't own Yu Yu Hakusho, ramen noodles, or any randomness I decide to add.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~^_^  
  
"DIE KOENMA, DIE!!" Kellie yelled as she began to pummel Yusuke. She wasn't awake either, she was just sleep walking.....err...pummeling.  
  
"Ha ha! Yusuke's being beat up by a girl!" Kuwabara laughed.  
  
Kellie stopped beating Yusuke for a minute and fell back into a deep sleep. Yusuke started threatening Kuwabara with imminent death. Then Kellie started sleep pummeling again. She pointed at Kuwabara and started to talk.  
  
"DON'T THINK I FORGOT ABOUT YOU OGRE! YOU WILL DIE TOO!"  
  
She began to beat Kuwabara mercilessly. It was actually really funny. But after a while, Kellie fell back to sleep. Everyone started to back away afterwards. Kellie was sleeping on the ground, curled up in a ball. For some unknown reason, the girl began to cry. The silent sobs streamed down her cheeks. Then it got stranger. She began to mumble.  
  
"It was an accident, daddy! Gib didn't mean it, I swear. Don't be upset, please!" she muttered.  
  
At the sight of this, Salumi turned and ran. She knew what Kellie was dreaming about. It was hard to explain to someone that didn't know her family. The wolf demon kept running until she was too tired. Suzuka had found her and kneeled next to her.  
  
"What's wrong?" he asked.  
  
"It's Kellie. She dreaming about something awful and I know what it is," Salumi cried.  
  
Suzuka pulled Salumi into his arms and tried to console her. He could feel her trembling in his grip. After a while her cries stopped, in fact she didn't make another sound. He turned his head and saw she had fallen asleep. He smiled; she looked so innocent when she slept.  
  
'Just like an angel...' he thought.  
  
Over at the camp, Kellie continued to sleep peacefully. Kurama had gone to chase after Salumi, Yusuke and Kuwabara was poking Kellie with a stick, and Hiei looked kind of confused.  
  
"Urameshi, what's happens if she wakes up?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
"We run if she's angry. We try to explain if she isn't." he answered.  
  
Kurama was chasing Salumi, or at least trying to. He lost track of her about twenty minutes beforehand. She was quite fast. After a couple of minutes he heard crying. Kurama snuck up on the crying demon and its companion. He recognized them; it was Salumi and Suzuka! He decided he would come later.  
  
Back at the camp, Kellie had woken up. She had no idea what she had mumbled. Everyone was staring at her like she was possessed.  
  
"WHAT?!" Kellie finally yelled, after a couple minutes of intense staring.  
  
"You were mumbling in your sleep about something, it was really creepy," Yusuke answered.  
  
"Did you know that I wrote a song for you? It's about ramen noodles," She said.  
  
"Huh?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
"I'm confused..." Yusuke answered.  
  
"Can I sing it?" she asked, half bouncing around.  
  
"Hn"  
  
"Ramen, ramen, ramen! You taste very yummy!  
Ramen, ramen, ramen! You fill up my tummy!  
I want ramen!  
I want ramen!  
I want ramen...NOW DAMNIT! I WANT SOME GOD-DAMN RAMEN!" Kellie sang.  
  
Kurama had come back during the last verse. Everybody there except Kellie gave her a weird look. She took a bow and looked through her bag again. She took out her diamond ring and sang "Bring Me to Life" by Evanescence.  
  
"Will someone please explain why she is singing to a ring?" Kurama asked to the confused and slightly scared group.  
  
"She woke up and started jabbering some gibberish about ramen noodles," Hiei replied.  
  
"Yeah, what shorty said," Kuwabara added.  
  
Yusuke rolled his eyes as Hiei and Kuwabara got into a fight. Meanwhile, Kurama was worried about Kellie's sanity. After she had stopped singing, she put her ring away and got this really weird possessed look in her eyes. She looked in the bushes yelling for her mother.  
  
"Momma? Momma?! Where are you Momma?!" she yelled.  
  
Hiei and Kuwabara stopped fighting, Yusuke stopped rolling his eyes and Kurama stood there dazed. She continued looking in the bushes until she peered up and glimpsed at them. A creepy smile "graced" her possessed face.  
  
"Momma!" Kellie cried as she latched her arms around Kurama's shoulders.  
  
Kurama stood there mortified, as Kuwabara and Yusuke broke out in fits of laughter. Hiei looked cheesed off while she was hugging Kurama.  
  
(A/N: O-o who knew? Annoyed is a synonym of cheesed off, weird)  
  
A few minutes after laughter, annoyance, and embarrassment, Kellie was tied to a tree while the guys were having a conversation.  
  
"So where is Salumi?" Yusuke asked.  
  
"She ran off to Suzuka," Kurama responded.  
  
".......Why?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
"I don't know," Kurama admitted.  
  
"Why am I tied to a tree?!" Kellie asked.  
  
"Because you started calling Kurama your mother," Hiei retorted.  
  
"..." Kellie blushed furiously.  
  
"So how does Salumi know Suzuka?" Kurama asked.  
  
Kellie's head shot up and she began to squirm.  
  
"I know! I know! Pick me!" she screamed happily.  
  
"What do you know?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
"She loves Suzuka. Just like you love Yukina and Yusuke loves Keiko and Kurama love-" Kellie blabbed.  
  
Kurama shot over to her like a rocket and covered her mouth with his hand. He sighed as her yells were muffled by his hand. Kellie had a suspicious look in her eye. She opened her mouth wide and chomped down on Kurama's hand.  
  
"OW!" Kurama screeched as he pulled his hand away.  
  
Kuwabara and Yusuke erupted in fits of laughter. A small smirk crossed Hiei lips when he saw the sight. Kurama glared at Kellie and she tried to look innocent. That was shattered when she burst into giggles. After a few minutes, they stopped laughing.  
  
"Hey Yusuke?" Kellie asked.  
  
"Yeah...?" Yusuke answered.  
  
"Can you get out your compact thingy and get Koenma on there? I need to talk to him," Kellie told him.  
  
"...But you HATE him. Why should I trust you?" Yusuke shot back.  
  
"What I have to discuss with him is very important. I promise not to break the compact thingy," she promised.  
  
"Fine," he retorted.  
  
Yusuke opened up the compact communicator and got Botan on the connection.  
  
"Hey Yusuke!" the overly cheery grim reaper exclaimed.  
  
"Hey Botan. Can you get Koenma on? I need to talk with him," Yusuke asked.  
  
"Sure, just hold on a minute," she answered.  
  
"Botan! I told you not to disturb when I'm napping!" was heard in the background. Koenma then got on the connection looking quite annoyed.  
  
"Hello Yusuke, what did you need to speak to me-" Koenma started.  
  
"It's the little man!" Kellie shouted as she snatched the communicator away from Yusuke.  
  
"Ummm...Hello....?" Koenma responded.  
  
"Hi short stack, I was the one who wanted to talk to you," Kellie told him.  
  
"Who are you?" he asked.  
  
"My name is Kellie Terwilliger. You're after a demon that used to be my dog. Her name is Salumi," she added.  
  
"Why does this concern you? Why are you even on the island?" Koenma asked.  
  
"Salumi is a good friend of mine and Suzuka took me here!" she answered.  
  
"What?" he asked utterly confused.  
  
"...But that's not what I wanted to talk to you about. Anyways, would you be willing to break up true love to take a demon into wherever you put them?" Kellie asked.  
  
"Well, it depends on the crime. Why do you ask?" he responded  
  
"Is Salumi's crime so bad that you have to put her in jail or whatever?" Kellie asked urgently.  
  
"I guess not," he replied again.  
  
"Salumi's in love with Suzuka! You can't take them apart, it would be very wrong!" Kellie yelled into the compact.  
  
"Ok, I'll give her a pardon. Just don't yell again, please."  
  
"Ok!" she answered happily.  
  
Kellie slammed the compact shut and tossed it back to Yusuke. She began to pace and looked serious.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~^_^  
  
Thanks to the people who did my favor!! Saiyaka: Someone save me.... TUO: I hope you eat raw meat Saiyaka Saiayaka: *tries to kill TUO*  
  
TUO: *runs away* oh crap!  
  
Saiyaka: Please review; no one likes a manic depressant who believes life is crap. Baka Hikari  
  
TUO: I heard that! Stupid yami, wait....she's right.*sobs*  
  
Saiyaka: -_-;;  
  
Chibi Chibi and Chibi Mini: *dancing with a match* 


	6. Turning down the insanity for angst

Hello once again! Saiyaka: I think you just like being lazy....  
  
T-T well it was Blade of Fire that got me off my lazy ass to update.  
  
Thanks to: Blade of Fire: ^_^ yeah I guess I should update more...  
  
Edie: I love your new name and.......YAMI IS A MORON, IN YOUR FACE!!!! =P  
  
Blue moon girl: This chappie isn't AS insane but its funny ^^;  
  
WindKit: why thank you! ^____________^  
  
Fern eye: sorry I didn't include you last chapter!! Gomen x 10!!!! And Arigato!  
  
TheRealKelly: Thank you, and Gomen I forgot you in Chappie 4!!!  
  
On with my ficcie oh yeah! (If I owned it, Kurama/Hiei would be a mandatory pairing!) ~~~~~~~~~~~~!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~! Kellie slammed the compact shut and tossed it back to Yusuke. She began to pace and looked serious.  
  
(A/N: Is that possible?! O-o)  
  
"Is there a hot spring on the isle?" she asked.  
  
"There's one about 3 miles ahead," Kurama responded.  
  
"Hiei?" she asked innocently; the girl had an idea.  
  
"No"  
  
"Damn," she cursed. 'Well there goes that idea.'  
  
"See y'all later!" She called back as she sauntered off into the distance, will her bag slung over her shoulder.  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@ 2 ½ miles later....  
  
Kellie trudged on, looking really annoyed and tired. She fidgeted with the strap on her shoulder and mumbled about lots of different stuff. She pushed aside another tree branch and finally spotted the hot spring. A sudden burst of energy helped her to speed over to the steaming water.  
  
"Hooray!!!" Kellie cheered as she danced a little dance of happiness.  
  
She stopped and looked around, checking to see if anyone else was near. Confirming that no one was, she began to take of her white sneakers that were now covered in mud. Next off were her jeans. Once off, they revealed slightly bruised legs. Then her red and blue swirled shirt, exposing her not-so-thin frame covered in marker. Slipping off her underwear, she jumped into the hot spring. Kellie rubbed off the doodles on her stomach, making the water tint orange, green, black, and blue.  
  
Kellie tipped her head back and retreated under the surface. She enjoyed the hot water cleansing herself. About a second after she had gone under, the earth began to rumble slightly. The girl pushed up quickly and gasped for the sweet air her lungs craved. That's when she noticed it. It looked almost human, except for the fact that its hands were blue and its arms were tinted red. Kellie lowered her head so that the top of her head stuck up.  
  
The thing came closer to her little oasis. Her heartbeat pounded in her chest as it spied her clothing. Picking it up, the demon sniffed the tie- dye shirt. He continued to smell it until a small breeze blew over the hot spring. His head shot up, sending blonde hair flying. Piercing grey blue eyes shot around, searching for the scent. His eyes finally spied the head staring at him. A little smirk crossed its face.  
  
Kellie's eyes showed complete fear when the demon found her. Wings of pure flames shot from his back. She tried to move away but found herself unable to respond to her brain's commands. He sauntered closer to her. She tried to scream but her whole body was paralyzed with fear. The youkai reached down and grabbed a handful of her sopping wet hair and pulled her up. Kellie cringed as he pulled her up from the water.  
  
The demon examined her unclothed body until Kellie slapped him. She dropped into the water again. She glared a look of pure hatred as his laughter filled her ears. He pulled her out of the water again, but threw a piece of cloth at her this time. She wrapped it around her wet body. The demon latched a clawed hand onto her upper arm and practically dragged her to another spot on this remote island.  
  
"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, OW DAMN IT OW!" was heard as they walked away.  
  
@@@@@~~~  
  
On another side of the island, a girl about the age 13 was kicking some demonic ass. Swinging her sword, she sliced and diced the demon Washitare. He had insulted her by calling her a weak human. Now he laid dieing, pouring crimson regret. Her deep chocolate brown eyes peered ahead. A small breeze blew, sending a lock of her blonde hair flying. She tucked it behind her ear and continued to go.  
  
"Aluthri! Wait up!" a boy about the same age cried.  
  
He ran up behind Aluthri, cursing himself for wearing baggy blue jeans. He tugged on his black shirt, making the letters of "Hell yeah I got issues" stretch out. The boy was a traveling companion for Ali. He helped her on missions she couldn't quite handle alone. One of the other reasons she took him along was because of a special power he had. When he wanted to, he could make fireballs. The only problem was that they changed color with his mood since he hadn't quite mastered the technique.  
  
@@@@@~~~  
  
Kellie winced as sharp claws dug into her arm when she hesitated to walk. His grey blue eyes shined a menacing black for a second as he glared down at her. It seemed they had finally reached their destination, a large cave with a mossy curtain hanging from above. The demon sat down to rest, trying to collect his thoughts.  
  
"Where are we?" Kellie asked her words coated in anger and fear.  
  
"At master's cave. He's needed a new wench ever since the last one killed herself," he answered calmly.  
  
A wave of panic struck Kellie. Since when did she look like she needed this added to her list of mental problems? Anger boiled in her, making her face cherry with rage. 'Great, just fucking great, now I'm some demon's whore!' she thought. Wrapping the cloth tighter around her body, she plotted her escape.  
  
@@@@@~~~  
  
Back at Camp Urameshi the team was having a dilemma. Koenma had assigned them a new mission because he was WAY too lazy to get them home. He assigned them to track a half demon, half goblin named Suppainiku. He was known for supplying weapons to hordes of demons for his own selfish gain and umm....fulfilling his (*cough cough*) "pleasures".  
  
"I seriously think Koenma is trying to kill us," Yusuke accused.  
  
"He can't kill me because I am the mighty Kazuma Kuwabara and I have a sword!" Kuwabara yelled.  
  
"Oh shut the hell up," Hiei demanded.  
  
Kurama kept quiet. These missions were starting to get on his last nerve, which didn't happen very often. Currently, he was thinking about killing off Urameshi and Kuwabara because they were stupid and annoying. The two kept fighting and Kurama's left eye began to twitch rapidly. The two that were fighting noticed this and backed away slowly.  
  
@@@@@~~~  
  
With Ali and Mike there was a different problem. Mike just HAD to go find more demons to fight, so now they were outnumbered 50 to 1. Right then there were about four demons dancing around in flames. Mike chuckled while Ali groaned. Aluthri continued to slit demonic throats until there was one left. Mike was dancing his little victory dance as Ali questioned the remaining demon.  
  
"Who are you?" she asked.  
  
"Only master's servant," he answered in a terrified manor.  
  
"Who is your master?" she inquired.  
  
"Master is master," he replied proudly.  
  
"Take me to your master" Ali was plenty irked at this baka youkai.  
  
The demon shook his head but soon changed his mind as cold steel was placed near his throat. He then nodded and ran off. Grabbing Mike, Ali sped off after him.  
  
@@@@@~~~  
  
Kellie, who was currently mumbling to herself, glanced around quickly. The "guard" demon had fallen asleep while waiting. She took her chance and stood up. The girl snuck away quietly. A small sheet of rain covered the island, making her escape time incredibly shorter. Dirty blonde hair clung to her shoulders.  
  
@@@@@~~~  
  
The demon had led Ali and Mike to a moss curtained cave. Ali only spied a sleeping guard and retreating human footprints. She gave him a half smile, half death glare look as she stepped closer to him. The demon continued humming and tapping his toe. Soon Ali was strangling him to death. His arms flailed and he gasped for the air he was missing. Mike backed away slowly, trying not to bring attention to himself. When Ali got mad, you stayed out of the way. He decided to leave Ali to her business and follow the fleeing prints.  
  
@@@@@~~~  
  
Kurama, whose eye was STILL twitching rapidly, stalked off. Hiei followed, now that the fight was over. Yusuke stuck his hands in his pockets and followed the two others. Kuwabara stood there for a second, utterly confused. Then, he noticed he was being left behind. The idiot quickly caught up to them.  
  
~~~~!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!  
  
Aolla!! (that's for you Brenda!)  
  
Please review, I won't forget this time!!!!! T-T  
  
Saiyaka: I think her dad stole her sugar...  
  
Chibi Chibi and Chibi Mini: *covered in chocolate* ummm....yeah...he did.... .  
  
Taisetsu: *rolls her eyes*  
  
Hitori: I swear....*finishes the chocolate* ^_^ 


	7. The homeschoolers' bonfire dance

Okey dokey! I'm back; everybody rejoice! *halfhearted rejoice from audience* I SAID REJOICE!!! *audience rejoices fearfully*  
  
Ok, I finally have internet again! ^_^  
  
Answer Review Time! (I only had 2 *sobs*)  
  
WindKit: No, unfortunately, they won't be killed by Kurama. I'm so happy you think my story is funny!  
  
Blade of Fire: (1) Yes, Mike got y'all outnumbered by demons. (2)HE'S NOT MY BOYFRIEND ANYMORE! (3)You're not traveling alone unless I kill off EVERYBODY! (4)Mike deserves a part as much as you do (well not AS much as you) and you'll have large part.  
  
Disclaimer: If life punches you, punch back; if life kicks you, kick back; if life throws you headfirst into a thorny bush --- well that's life! And mine tells me I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho. ~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
"So...ummm.....where are we going again?" Kuwabara inquired.  
  
Kurama turned to him, as his eye stopped twitching for a few seconds. He took in a deep breath and calmly stated: "We are trying to find Suppainiku and this island before he causes any more trouble."  
  
"Oh"  
  
Kuwabara kept quiet and they continued to search. Kurama had finally quit his eye twitching and Hiei wasn't provoking anybody.  
  
(A.N: It's a miracle! I seriously think this story has issues....I mean I'm confused about who had the crystal @-@;;;;)  
  
"So....ummm.....what does this guy look like anyways?"  
  
"If we knew, we wouldn't have to keep searching and asking every fucking demon on this island!" Yusuke responded.  
  
"Oh"  
  
Only the rain could be heard. Well it was until......  
  
KABOOM!!!!  
  
"Next time that will be your head!!!" a female voice screamed.  
  
The Yu Yu gang snuck up on the scene. Through the dust everyone spotted a teenager with short blonde hair. She had a scabbard at her side with the actual sword in her hand. A trembling demon stood by a large pile of rubble.  
  
"Just tell me who this 'master'-guy is and I won't kill you!"  
  
"Hi-his n-name is Suppainiku"  
  
The demon had reduced to puddles on the floor. He quivered violently under her intense glare. She took a few steps closer and reached her hand down. Grabbing him by the throat, the blonde shoved him against the still- standing rock.  
  
"Where is he?" she whispered through clenched teeth.  
  
"I-I d-don-don't kn-know"  
  
She let him down and gave him a parting message:  
  
"Tell your master that Aluthri is coming for him"  
  
The demon bolted off, not glancing back. Aluthri sat down and began to mumble to herself. After a minute or so, her head shot up.  
  
"Oh great, now where in all of hell did he go?"  
  
The detectives looked confused. Yusuke shifted, causing a leaf to crunch. Aluthri's head turned in that direction. She stood up and walked over to them, her gaze never wavering.  
  
"Who's there?"  
  
"We are!" Yusuke answered. Kurama smacked himself on the forehead while Hiei groaned.  
  
"You idiot!" Hiei hissed.  
  
The rain let up, leaving a soggy island to deal. Aluthri drew back slightly after registering that someone had answered.  
  
"What the fuck?! Are you some kind of hippie Yusuke?"  
  
"No, I am Yusuke!.....Wait...hippie?! What the hell?"  
  
"Ummm...eh heh heh. Does that mean Hiei is here?"  
  
"Yes...."  
  
Aluthri beamed. Hiei backed away from the bush slowly only to run into Kurama. They both fell back, with Hiei on Kurama. Kurama blushed furiously and Hiei scrambled off. Aluthri found them and beamed more if that's possible.  
  
Kellie, who was wheezing now, spied the secluded hot spring. Changing into new clothes, she resolved one thing --- never EVER run again. The girl resolved to go back to the cave where she had run from. This seemed smart at the time...the key phrase is "at the time". Grabbing her things, she walked to the cave. On her way there, she thought she could smell something burning....  
  
Back with the Yu Yu gang, things got ever crazier. Ali had found Mike (who now has a lump on his head for leaving) and took out some pompoms. Mike took out peanut butter, eggs, and some spoons; he lit a bonfire and spread peanut butter on everybody's faces.  
"Ok! Now when you get your spoon, put the egg on it. Then dance around the bonfire like a crazed idiot," Ali explained.  
  
Kurama glanced at Hiei helplessly as his face was covered in peanut butter. Ali and Mike, who were covered in peanut butter, stuck the spoon with the egg on it in their nose and started dancing. Everyone else followed their lead. Ali waved her pompoms wildly, which caught one on fire. She handed it to Mike, who handed it to Kurama, who handed it to Hiei. Hiei threw it into the fire.  
"That's the spirit Hiei!" Ali yelled.  
  
"Hn"  
  
Kellie reached her destination (FINALLY!) and stood with her mouth agape. The Yu Yu gang, her ex, and her best friend were dancing around a bonfire. She rubbed her eyes, trying to see if she was just delusional.  
  
"MIKE?! AUDREY?!!!!" Kellie screamed once she got a clear view.  
  
Almost the whole group stopped, with the exception of Kuwabara because he was dancing to the beat of his own drum if you know what I mean. Kuwabara ran into Yusuke and fell back, when he then finally noticed Kellie.  
  
"KELLIE?!" Mike and Ali chorused.  
  
"You know these insane fools?" Hiei questioned.  
  
"Of course! Mike is my ex and Audrey is my best friend," Kellie answered.  
  
"Ok, I'm confused. Who is Audrey?" Yusuke asked.  
  
"I am" Ali confessed.  
  
"I thought you were Aluthri!" Kuwabara stated.  
  
"Well that's my demon hunting name. At school, my name is Audrey. Eh heh heh" Ali/Audrey answered. (This is Audrey ( ^.^;;)  
  
"Well, now I'm officially lost," Yusuke declared on his part.  
  
"We second that," Mike added for himself and Kuwabara.  
"Anyways," Audrey began as she ignored the "lost ones", "how the fucking hell did you get here Kellie?"  
  
"Well, long story short, my family's kidnapped, I'm looking for the demon form of my dead dog, and trying to take a bath without being taken by a youkai pimp. Got that?"  
  
"No, but I'll get it eventually."  
  
Kellie hung her head and muttered something about not being surprised. Mike and Kuwabara (Mike's favorite character) decided they had nothing better to do; so they began to play baseball. Y'know, like back in the Genkai tournament?  
  
Yeah, so anyways, Yusuke began poking fun at Hiei. He'd comment on demons not playing baseball, then go to Hiei's height, and eventually come back to baseball. This gave Audrey her opportunity. She smacked Yusuke with her scabbard and glomped Hiei mercilessly. Kellie just stood there and watched Hiei being choked to death by her friend glomp. Kurama shot a continuous death glare at Ali.  
  
(A/N: Kurama's jealous! ^.^ Tee hee)  
  
"Hey Audrey, Mike!" Kellie yelled between giggles, "You both owe me twenty bucks!"  
  
The two mentioned stared at her in mystification. Mike was then smacked with the fireball he threw and had to put out his hair. Hiei managed to free himself of Ali's grasp.  
  
"What are you talking about?" Mike asked.  
  
"Do you remember that bet we made? I bet both of you $20 that Hiei and Kurama were a couple in secret. Audrey denied till she was blue in the face and you accepted. So...umm....HA! I WAS RIGHT! WOOHOO!" Kellie clarified in whispers.  
  
Both grumbled as they handed over their money. Mike then returned to his game with Kuwabara while Audrey pouted about the loss of money. When she got bored of that, Aluthri began to smack Yusuke around until they both got into this huge brawl. Hiei and Kurama gave equally powerful deadly glares to Kellie; they had heard.  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
Hooray for jealousy!  
  
Muses: o.O;; um ok...  
  
Anyways, review please! I worked really hard on this chapter and chappie 8! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW!!!! 


	8. While you were out

Hello Everyone! I'm actually posting!  
  
Readers: IT'S THE APACOLYPSE!!!  
  
-.-;; yes I know but I recently had help form one of my best friends, Audrey! She has helped me sooooooooo much and I must give her credit:  
  
Thank you for letting me use your.....odd......dance in the last chapter and for helping me get over writers' block with your surplus of plot bunnies. They haunt me at night....  
  
Anyways, after standing outside in a thunderstorm for 20 minute, I decided I should post today. Enjoy!  
  
Warnings: Idiots, suggested shonen-ai, evilness to the poor messenger dude-  
  
Messenger dude: T-T Your so hurtful Audrey!  
  
Yeah, and on we go! ~~~~~~~~~Chapter 8—While you were out...~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"AUDREY! QUIT FIGHTING WITH YUSUKE! I need to talk with you," Kellie shrieked.  
  
Ali stopped and stomped over to Kellie. Losing the bet wasn't completely bad, but Kellie kept interrupting her fights!  
  
"Now what do you want?" Audrey asked exasperated.  
  
"I need to ask you a couple of things. First, how did you get here?" She questioned.  
  
"Well, ummmm I kinda created a portal. See, I've been looking up teleportation spells and I found this great portal creator spell. So I tried it and it worked. Then I started practicing my teleportation; that's how I tripped Aunan. Afterwards I began long distance and picked up Mike. That's how we got to this world," The blonde droned.  
  
"Ok then. Second, have you heard anything about my family?"  
  
"What? Did your dad finally walk out or something?"  
  
"No," Kellie said with a sad sigh, "but I got this note that said everyone was kidnapped."  
  
Craaaaaaaaack! Everyone suddenly shut up and turned towards the brush that surrounded them. Labored breathing engulfed their now sensitive ears. They stayed tense for a few more dull moments until... Craaaaaaaaaaaaack! Cruuuuuunch! Squish! "Ew, I just stepped in something!"  
  
Mike had begun to torch the shrubbery in the general direction when Hiei had snatched the intruder. The dried undergrowth burnt quickly and produced an awesome shadow affect on Hiei and the trespasser. The fire subsided as dirt was poured over it by the rest of the Reikai Tantei.  
  
"Let go of me, you filthy midget!"  
  
THWAP! Audrey's katana smacked the uninvited guest in the back of the head.  
  
"Hey, Audrey?" Mike asked cautiously.  
  
"Yes?" she inquired with a small spin in his direction.  
  
"Isn't that the ----"Mike began before he was cut off.  
  
"..thing that you were threatening earlier?" Kuwabara finished.  
  
She looked back at the demon. Now that she thought about it, it was the stupid one she was about to kill earlier! Albeit he was sporting some new cuts and bruises, Audrey could see the stupidity in his eyes.  
  
"Yeah, but his master obviously doesn't like that message I gave him!" she stated proudly.  
  
The youkai messenger and Kellie now had super sweat drops. Kellie mumbled something about stupidity in numbers while Mike began to juggle. Well, it turns out Mike can't juggle very well...  
  
"AAAAAHHH!!! IT BURNS!!!! OH MY GOD IT BURNSSSSS!!!!!!" Mike screamed when he tripped and fell on his fireballs.  
  
Mike jumped and flailed his arms. He ran around in circles for almost five minutes before anyone really cared. Everyone casually glared at him. The courier waved his hands a little and squirted Mike with water. "Hey!" Audrey yelped indignantly at the demon. "I was enjoying that! It was funny, and actually entertaining!"  
  
The messenger just looked at her. "And I'm supposed to care?"  
  
Audrey glared at it, making it cringe away in fright. The others backed up, knowing what was coming, and not wanting to get in the way. "Yes, you should. You really should." She suddenly looked thoughtful. "Although I guess it wouldn't matter. I'm going to kill you anyways!" She said the last part cheerfully, smiling happily.  
  
"Uhh....Umm..." the demon stuttered, somehow suddenly just becoming aware that this was the girl who had strangled him earlier. 'Shit'  
  
Audrey quickly drew her katana, and with speed that almost impressed even Hiei, almost sliced the demon neatly in half with one powerful downward sweep. Almost is the key word there. Kellie quickly stepped in front of the youkai herald. Audrey stopped just in time. The two girls had a stare- off, with Audrey winning in the end. Kellie lost because she laughed at Mike.  
  
"If we want to find whoever is running things around here, we gotta keep him alive," Kellie whispered to Audrey.  
  
Audrey sheathed her katana and glared at Kellie. Both had the glaring competition. If we could actually see it, there would be electricity sparking in the air. Mike wandered off, Kurama and Hiei went to do....something..., our favorite two idiots decided they wanted to get into a splashing fight so they ran to the beach.  
  
"Where did everyone go?" Audrey asked, losing the contest.  
  
"I betcha I know where Kurama and Hiei went," Kellie said with a smirk.  
  
"SHUT UP! IT'S NOT TRUE! THEY'RE JUST GOOD FRIENDS!" Audrey screamed.  
  
Kellie doubled over in laughter at the outburst. Audrey had veins popping all over her head. The laughing moron tried to calm down, but it was just too funny. Audrey had enough of it and smacked Kellie with her scabbard.  
  
THWAAAAACK!!!  
  
"OWWWWWWWWWW!!" Kellie screeched.  
  
The messenger sat there, watching. Never in his life had he seen a pair of friends like them. Sure demons beat on each other, but not friends. He grew uncomfortable then. If they beat on each other like that they must be worse on enemies. 'Good thing they're just ningen weaklings,' he thought trying to reassure himself.  
  
The beat-down continued for some time. It ended as Kellie mumbled something about the new trout CD, making them both giggle.  
  
(A/N: Yay for inside jokes!)  
  
"Little messenger demon dude, can I call you Moshi?" Kellie asked out of the clear blue.  
  
"Ummmmm...I guess so..." he said warily.  
  
"Well, that's good. I was gonna call you that anyway," Kellie answered happily.  
  
"So........where are you from? Who is your master dude? Is there any armies involved?" Audrey quickly asked.  
  
"Ummm...Makai, obviously, Suppainiku, and yes, there is an army." Moshi answered.  
  
"HOOORAY!!!" Audrey screamed.  
  
"Audrey, did you take your medication today?" Kellie asked sweetly.  
  
Audrey was then plagued by shifty eyes and concluded, "Maybe..."  
  
(A/N: Now to a POV I haven't shown before!)  
  
Elsewhere on this supremely crowded island, Konoyama and her (dun dun DUNNNN!!) army feasted on the bananas Kurama had pointed out. Well, all except for the rockish demons; they ate some uhhhh....dirt...yeah dirt!  
  
(A/N: Yay for improvising!)  
  
"Y'know, I heard that these yellow things are supposed to be a human delicacy," one army demon said.  
  
"Yeah, the center is good.....but the skin tastes......odd....." his companion answered.  
  
Konoyama and her second in command, Washitare, both sweat dropped. It was a miracle the makeshift army did so well on the battlefront. Common sense was in short supply, but their fighting skills made up for it all.  
  
"IDIOTS! YOU PEEL THE SKIN OFF FIRST!" Konoyama shrieked. The rockish demons the tried to peel the skin off of the dirt with no success. The midget youkai sighed heavily and covered her face with her hands. Bending down, Washitare took her hands from her face and looked her in the eye.  
  
"Don't let the stupidity get to you," he offered sagely.  
  
Konoyama shook her head and smiled only partially. Washitare moved in, stealing a small kiss from her full lips. He stood and went over to his ishi-youkai. Kono's chocolate complexion burned a bright red for quite some time afterwards.  
  
"Hey commander?" one of the ishi-youkai called out, "Where's our messenger?"  
  
A large cloud of dust then hung over where Konoyama had fallen over. A huge vein was popping on her forehead as she gritted her teeth.  
  
"You mean you don't know?" she asked angrily.  
  
"Well, we didn't see him come back..." the rock demon said, cowering.  
  
"Then let's go find him," she said between her teeth.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Chibi Chibi: Well, TUO is sleeping now.....  
  
TUO: ZzZzZzZz..._-_  
  
Chibi Mini: So we'd like to thank in advance all who are going to review....*whispers*Hint hint wink wink nudge nudge!!  
  
REVIEW!!! 


	9. Dreaming dreams of a dreamer

Hello Everyone! I can't believe I'm finally posting. I feel like such a lazy ass...what am I saying? I AM A LAZY ASS! Now I tell you the words of the book of the Disclaimer:

Yu Yu Hakusho shall never belong to TUO, but she may keep Cratio.

And now, on to the story!

Back with the girls, Moshi sat in amusement as Kellie shoved a couple of pills down Audrey's throat. She writhed, trying to escape from the evil medication. Fortunately (or not), Kellie had enough weight for the both of them so she could sustain the other girl. After Audrey took hers reluctantly, Kellie secretly popped a few of Audrey's pills in her own mouth.

"Goodbye...cruel...leg" Kellie mumbled as she fell asleep.

"DAMNIT! SHE ATE MY PILLS!" Audrey screamed.

Audrey then began to beat her, even though she was sleeping. Kellie didn't budge for a second, she just kept sleeping. Finally getting bored, Audrey kicked her in the side and sat next to a tree.

"I really don't want to know what that was all about," Moshi mumbled.

"She ate my pills! They make me sleep...sometimes...so she's gonna be out cold for a while."

Moshi nodded, not quite understanding the whole "pills" idea. He sat there thinking of what he should do while Audrey drew pictures in the dirt. Mike wandered back in and sat next to Kellie, whose right leg was twitching madly. So madly, in fact, that she ended up kicking Mike in the shin. He scooted farther away and lay on the ground. Kellie rolled over and hugged him, and mumbled the name Sphen.

Mike looked jealous for a split second and tried to move away. Unfortunately, Kellie dug her finger nails into him when he tried. Mike sat there thinking for a minute or so before he had an idea. He slipped out of his shirt and backed off a few feet, leaving Kellie to clutch the shirt as she rolled over again.

"What the hell are you doing?" Audrey asked as she saw Mike without his shirt and Kellie snuggling it like a stuffed animal.

"Believe me, you don't want to know."

"I'll take your word for it," Audrey said as she went back to drawing.

Mike, deciding it was better not to get close, went off once more. Trotting off, he searched for Yusuke and Kuwabara. His quest ended at the beach, where Kuwabara and Yusuke were no longer in the water. Actually, they were pelting each other with rocks and seaweed and such.

"Guys? Guuuuys? HEY! I'M TALKING TO YOU!" Mike bellowed.

Kuwabara looked over to him, which lead to him being hit with seaweed again by Yusuke. He just picked it off and flung it back. Due to Yusuke's laughter, the ocean plant landed smack dab in the middle of his mouth. Gagging, Yusuke began to threaten the big goof within an inch of his life.

"DAMN IT! PAY ATTENTION!" Mike screamed.

Yusuke and Kuwabara backed away from each other resentfully, and turned toward the screaming idiot.

"Where's your shirt, man?" Kuwabara asked.

"Why do you think I've been screaming at you?! I NEED YOUR HELP!"

"Spirit Detectives to the rescue again," Yusuke stated with a sigh, "how may we help you?"

Mike looked at his feet and burned bright red. He mumbled something that the two couldn't understand and dug his feet in the sand. The spirit secretary (A.K.A. Kuwabara) looked baffled while Yusuke began to crack up.

"She...HAHAHA! Has your...HAHAHA! Shirt?!" he chortled.

Kuwabara soon joined in the infectious laughter. The two were doubling over as Mike boiled in rage.

"It's not my fault she's an evil sleeper! I swear to God she was gonna kill me!" Mike defended.

"Oh no! Kellie's going to take our shirts as she sleeps!" Kuwabara snickered.

"Yeah! Next thing you know, she's gonna steal Hiei's belts!" Yusuke chortled.

"I wouldn't put it past her," Mike muttered under his breath.

Once they had calmed down, the shirtless one led them to the scene. Kellie had rolled over again, and had begun to gnaw on the shirt. For a second she nuzzled it but then started to chew it again. Kuwabara and Yusuke looked at each other knowingly and snickered.

"Would you just get my shirt back?" Mike said with a roll of his eyes.

The dynamic duo cooked up a plan and set into action. Yusuke crept over and pried her away from the shirt for a second. Then Kuwabara summoned something like spirit tongs and pulled the shirt from her grasp. He promptly handed it to Mike, trying to avoid the drools stain on the sleeve.

Mike slipped his shirt back on and all was fine until...

"Has anyone fed Cratio?" Kellie asked, still half asleep. (Pronounced Cray-she-o)

"Who..."

"...the hell..."

"...is..."

"...Cratio?" Everyone asked.

Kellie, still half conscious, answered, "My dad's pet shark...don't you remember?"

Mike looked over at Audrey, who then looked back at him. It suddenly dawned on her what she meant. Smirking, she went over and woke Kellie, none too gently. The nutcase bolted up and looked around. She sighed a sigh of relief.

"I had the weirdest dream! First, I was eating a cake that tasted like cheap cologne. Then the cake turned into a dragon and burnt me. Finally, the dragon became Audrey and she was stealing my shiny!"

"What does that have to do with Cratio?" Kurama enquired.

"What in the world are you talking bout?" The ever-drowsy blonde asked.

Audrey laughed and walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Believe me, it's a long story."

Kurama lost hope on ever finding out about this "Cratio" story. He turned back to the double trouble team, he looked a bit curious. Kellie had a dazed look around her and had also begun to drool. Audrey smacked Kellie, demanding to know what she was thinking.

Kurama scooted next to Hiei and leaned down to whisper, "What's she thinking about Hiei?"

Hiei nodded in response and removed his headband carefully. The Jagan glowed as he peered into her thoughts. He probed slightly in the mess of notions. He came across her current one and quickly pulled out. His eyes were as wide as saucers.

"Hiei, what is it?" Kurama asked worriedly.

Hiei, coming back to his senses, glimpsed up at the fox's face. As soon as he did, he regretted it. His cheeks burned bright red. Regaining his composure, he simply answered "Hn."

Deciding it was best to leave Hiei in this state of shock, Kurama wandered over to Audrey, who was currently trying to figure out why she was thinking of so vividly.

"C'mon Kellie! I know you aren't thinking of FAKE, you'd be manically smirking if you were. What are you imagining?!"

Tapping his finger on his chin, Mike came up with an idea that might bring her back. He called over Kurama and whispered his plan into the youko's ear. He stuttered in protest, which ended up being futile.

"It's either that or have Kuwabara make out with Yusuke."

"I vote Yusuke and Kuwabara," Hiei stated monotonously.

Kurama looked over at the icy fire demon. He was still tinged red, and so was Kurama thanks to the idea. They both glared at Mike and then looked at each other nervously.

"Oh, alright. We'll do it." Kurama said finally giving in.

Mike, deciding it was best for his sanity, ushered Yusuke, Kuwabara, and himself away for the upcoming scene. Audrey just walked into the bushes and secretly set up a video camera. '_Maybe I can trade this for something_' Audrey pondered. She pushed the record button and waited.

"You could just smack her you know," Hiei pouted.

"Well, I don't think that would accomplish anything," Kurama told him.

Both demons looked nervously at each other, then to the drooling girl, and back to them.

"Just a quick peck, got it?" Hiei confirmed.

Kurama nodded curtly and began to lean in. Hiei stood on his tip-toes as Kurama leaned down. Things went according to plan, just a small peck on Hiei's luscious lips, until Youko figured out what was happening.

'_Thanks Shu-chan_,' he whispered with a smirk.

Youko took over Kurama's consciousness, causing small streaks of white to appear in the fiery red mane. He moved his hands quickly and carefully; one Hiei's waist, the other in his hair so he couldn't escape. The fox's tongue ran over the little Koorime's bottom lip, sending shivers up his spine and causing his eyes to fly open. He struggled to break free, only to be pulled tighter against Kurama's lithe form. The fox youkai took advantage of the other's surprise and slipped his tongue inside. Hiei fought back momentarily, but seeing as he had no idea what was going on he gave up. They both broke free for air soon afterwards.

'_Good luck little Shuichi_' Youko whispered once more while giving back the boy his mind.

Kurama came back to his senses and saw what he dreamed of. There was Hiei wrapped in his arms. Hiei glared up at him and he quickly pulled away. Hiei disappeared into the brush, leaving a disappointed Kurama.

Of course, this had woken up Kellie. She secretly decided that it was much better live than it was in her imagination. She scrambled over to Audrey and saw the video camera. Audrey pushed the stop button as Kellie smirked at her.

"Somehow 'I told you so' doesn't quite cover it," she said malevolently.

Ok, finally done! I've been wanting to put in something like that for over 8 chapters! Personally, I think it could be done better by another author but TOUGH FUCKING LUCK! Ha-ha! I like doing that to myself. So review and tell me what you think!


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